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The Dos and Don’ts to Naming Your Pet

Naming a pet is a very important step in your relationship. Not only does it give your loved one their identity, but it also reflects on you as you have to use that name in public.

Don’t Wait Too Long
You really should name your pet right away. The sooner he or she has to get used to the name the better. It’s also best not to change their name, even if you get the pet later in life. I’ve learned that by the names I’ve given to my teenage daughter’s boyfriends. They have a hard time getting used to their new names like Bonehead, Deadbeat, or Wingnut.

Keep it Simple
Two syllable names work best for both you and your pet. Not only will your pet learn to associate a two-syllable name easier but it will go better for you as well. Princess Buttercup is a bit long to yell every time she runs away from you or coughs up a hairball on your carpet. Also, one syllable names can be easily confused with the cuss words you may preface their name with sometimes.

Think Long Term
Naming your pet after something he or she does when young may not work in their later years. Naming a dog Squirt whether it’s descriptive of his size or propensity to do that, may not seem such a good idea when he grows to over 100 pounds and you wish all he did was “Squirt.”

For Your Own Good
Not to be the bearer of bad tidings, but you are the one who will be on the front porch yelling, “Fluffy or Buttercup or Snowball, come home”. You should be careful what names you use or you will be at the dog park barking, “Come here Mr. Fluffers.” Do you really want to be seen in public and be heard saying, “Sit Cuddle Muffin”?

Today’s Trend is Tomorrow’s Joke
Naming a pet after a celebrity is real funny until that celebrity goes away or at least you wish he would. I’m sure someone thought Bill Pawsby was a funny name at one time. No telling how Leonardo Catprio might turn out but I would be concerned about Smiley Cyrus if I were you. You should be safe with historical celebrities such as Bark Twain or Droolius Caesar as they are past the point of possibly screwing up their names.

Don’t Confuse the Issue
Of course you wouldn’t name your dog Fetch or every time you call her, she’d run away. Likewise you should not give him or her a name that will be confused with your children’s names either. Although someone like me would have a lot of fun with it, it’s not really a good idea. Imagine the scene if your son is named Tony and your dog is named Boney and someone overhears you yell “Speak Boney, speak, you can do it boy.” Or “Roll over Tony, good boy.” Okay, maybe that’s just me, but that’s funny.